“Letting go doesn’t mean that you don’t care about someone anymore. It’s just realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself.”
― Deborah Reber
“to love life, to love it even
when you have no stomach for it
and everything you’ve held dear
crumbles like burnt paper in your hands,
your throat filled with the silt of it.
When grief sits with you, its tropical heat
thickening the air, heavy as water
more fit for gills than lungs;
when grief weights you like your own flesh
only more of it, an obesity of grief,
you think, How can a body withstand this?
Then you hold life like a face
between your palms, a plain face,
no charming smile, no violet eyes,
and you say, yes, I will take you
I will love you, again.”
“Most people do not really want freedom, because freedom involves responsibility, and most people are frightened of responsibility.”
― Sigmund Freud,
“The price of greatness is responsibility.”
― Winston S. Churchill
Growth Comes From Acceptance, Taking Responsibility and Being Defenseless
This week was another “Ah-ha” week for me. Where all the pieces finally started coming together, and one that I had to face “The Guy in the Glass” and tell him as I have done for approxiatemently three months before, “I love You!”
I took me over four decades to understand that there was a purpose to my life, that I really and truly did have a much greater reason for being here, than what I mistakeningly thought was perhaps a mistake.
No MISTAKE! A grand opportunity to learn and to appreciate all the plethoria of opportunities that had laid before me. Did I see them?
Because I was like a fish out of water, floundering about and crying out for help, and using a myriad of coping mechanisms and self sabotaging thoughts and ideas to keep me in my comfortable life of “status quo”!
Through the Law of Least Effort, it took me very little effort, to maintain my life of misery, lack and constant struggle.
Alas, there were three important pieces that I had been missing, that I never truly grasped and understood until 15 months ago.
2. Taking Responsibility
3. Being Defenseless
1. Acceptance: Everything happens for a reason, in most cases the result of something is set in motion by a series of past or current events, that have a very defined outcome, based on the vibration put out into the Universal.
If vibrations are negative, results will be the same. Conversely, if vibrations are positive, so will then be the results. Acceptance is accepting that which we have set in motion, and learning from the end result, as to why things results in the manner they did.
The old blueprint would have put the coping mechanisms on full bore, and self-loathing, sabotage and self doubt would have washed over me like a raging tsuami!
One I learned to accept the results, as a result of the Universal progression of things, I began to grow, the self-doubt, self sabotage and self-loathing were no longer presence. It was a gentle calm, like that in the eye of a hurricane, I am able to reflect, and learn, and see opportunities disguised as adversity!
2. Taking Responsibility — I create my Universe, both from the “World Within” and the “World Without” I would constantly be blaming myself from the unfavourable situation that I was in at the time. Constantly beating myself up, never feeling worthy, or deserving of what I TRULY wanted.
Over the last 16 months, through an intensive coaching regime, and the MKMMA course, I have begun to understand, that what I think about, manifests and grows, and that all outcomes, are as a result of MY OWN doing, and NO one elses! Life is a series of choices, and admittedly, I have made quite a few questionable ones throughout life, those in themselves allowed me to get to where I am now in life, and so, through all the adversities and challenges that I was facing, really held a opportunity for me to turn my life around 180 degrees!!
3. Being Defensless — The Old Blueprint always wanted the last word! Always had to defend its position, even if it was something that served me no good, or had no time or place in defending, I always wanted to hear myself speak, and make my view known.
Two weeks ago, I embarked on a “silence” exercise. For 50 hours, all phones, computers, televisions, radios, and media were disallowed. The first few hours were a bit anxious, as the subby and the conscious mind were having an internal quarrel between one another. As a result, thoughts and direction were very scattered and unfocused. As the exercised progressed, the chaos quelled, and a peaceful silence and calm took over, the distractions were gone, ideas came like a flood, and the blessings of the moment, were put into very clear focus. I became one with the Universal those two days, and I got to meet and interact for the first time, with the person, I want to become!
Silence is golden!
Wow, what a ride!!
Thank You, Universe!
Nam Myoho Renge Kyo